tons of dick stuff

i punished myself this weekend.  like over and over and over again. it was just all the excitement of having not seen nikki in like over three years and then also loving all the dick stuff that caused things to get so out of control.  considering i was so far away from all the chicks my hands were tied in terms of doing lots of local planning.  but what i COULD do was clean house when it came to offensive dick paraphernalia and have it all shipped to nikki's soon-to-be sister and also construct her a tutu and hand-sew a bunch of dicks to it.  because you know - that's totally normal.
i took the bus to minneapolis at 2am on friday morning.  i'm actually shocked i made it on time and also shocked they let me on the bus because i noticed as i sat there waiting to board that the date on my ticket said august 1st and when i checked my phone told me it was august 2nd.  so naturally i just risked it and thankfully they let me on because i certainly didn't want to have to go all the way back home and buy another ticket just so that i could make it to the bachelorette party.  so after a stressful trek to the bus stop i managed to mix myself a cocktail in the bathroom of the moving bus which, might i say, is more difficult than one would think and then tweet the night away until nikki picked me up at the bus station at 8am.
i finally got to meet her puppy dog - trixie - who is obviously just too cute for words.

the majority of the day we spent day-drinking and cleaning her house in a half-assed manner and then passing out early because DUH the next day was going to be terrible.

and terrible it was.

and there you have it.

i don't have the wherewithal to write anything else at this point in time. i'm just living in a haze where my thoughts are just jumbled together and i can barely form coherent sentences.
side note - that dick tutu took me like six hours to make.  totally worth.
and naturally - shitler did this to mac when i brought home the balls.

and naturally it's time to link up with sami.