hello world.
i thought i would come here and let you know that it's been twenty-one days since i've had a carb. or anything booze related. basically anything delicious. and there's still 102 days left till i can have a carb. or booze. and basically my life sucks. and yes i measure the quality of my life in terms of carbs and booze so lay off me. because mainly i'm constantly fantasizing about food and/or watching shitler eat something delicious and then making him describe it to me in all sorts of food porn glory.
but i guess 102 more days of hellish no carb/no booze living is doable. doable but terrible.
so quickly let me tell you something sad.
i was sick over the weekend and couldn't keep any food down/all the smells of food made me want to hurl. and on saturday i tried to eat a sugar-free jell-o and i made it three bites in before i promptly upchucked said three bites (who throws up jell-o). so for three days i ate nothing and wallowed in my own self-pity. and then sunday night i felt slightly better and binge watched the following and defrosted some ground turkey because i got it in my head that i needed to have a turkey burger sans bun. so i finished defrosting said ground turkey in the microwave and then dumped a bunch of stuff (like an egg) in a bowl and mashed it all together. but my excitement for said turkey burgers sans bun quickly diminished when the consistency of the ground turkey revealed itself to be more mush like than solid like. naturally i chose to ignore that fact and press on, forming the mush as best i could into patties, and plopping them on the george foreman. the mushy patties looked like trash but i still had every intention of attempting to cook them. so i closed the lid on the foreman and watched the grill sink all the way closed - as in straight down through the mush patties. me, not being totally discouraged quite yet, chose to ignore that small bit and let it cook. like "hey self - maybe it's not as bad as you know it really is." after letting my mush patties cook for a bit i lifted the lid and everything was as terrible as i had tried to pretend it wasn't. mental picture: imagine browning ground turkey on a george foreman. because that's basically what i had done. nothing was in patty form and i wanted to cry. like seriously cry. p.s. i should mention i also got my period so all things in the world were working against me. so while shitler laughed maniacally at me from the living room i sadly scrapped my mushy turkey into the garbage, ate a sugar-free jell-o, and went to bed.
so that's my life. full of hunger and disappointment.
and i can't even drink to cope with it.
dear vodka - i miss you and i'll see you soon-ish.
p.s. sorry about this whole entire post because it's a bunch of garbage.
p.p.s. the no carb/no booze has been slightly effective. as in 11.3 pounds lost effective. so at least there's that.
