well monday - we meet again you son of a bitch.
i hope that everyone had like the best weekend ever because mine was total shit.
but that's a tale for another time.
today i bring you a server story.
which i think are the best because it's like you don't think people can actually be as asshole-ish as you think but then you have to wait on them and it turns out that some people are truly horrible.
so the story.
it was friday night. the restaurant was mildly busy when the manager decided to cut the floor (basic restaurant speak for going down to the closing servers and like me who is usually the last non-closing server to show up). and typically when this happens the servers still on the floor end up with full sections and a late dinner push. which is exactly what ended up happening. it was nothing insanely busy but it was enough to keep you running around.
i had a table with a gentleman and his wife. and at the beginning of service they had given me a movie ticket stub (the restaurant gives you five bucks off your meal if you go the movie theater across the street in the same day you come and eat at the restaurant) and i thanked them and put it in my pocket and went about my merry way. suffice it to say that the man was unbearable from the get-go. as in every time i checked on their table he went above and beyond to respond to make my questions with his obnoxious take on what my voice sounded like. not to mention that the times i did go back to the table it was evident that he found me doing my job to be an annoying interruption of whatever lame story he was telling and couldn't possibly be bothered with me asking if he wanted another drink. and it's exactly these people who are the kind who you can't ever win with. my mere presence annoyed him but had i stayed away he would have been peeved that i wasn't attentive enough.
so the meal came to an end, i ran their credit card, and so very sweetly it would give you cavities told them that i hoped they had a "wonderful weekend," and then high-tailed it to the kitchen. a few had minutes elapsed when a fellow server found me and told me that i had a table saying i had forgotten to take the five dollar discount off their bill. and after a slew of expletives because i had forgotten and i knew which table it was i ventured out to speak with the gentleman. i apologized profusely, told him i had completely forgot, and that i would void the transaction, take the five dollars off, and then re-run his credit card. his response: "no. that's ok. i'll just take it off your tip." and then he opened the check fold and in front of me furiously scribbled out the tip he had originally given me and wrote in the new tip.
in my head, while it was happening, i convinced myself i looked like this:
in reality i'm sure i looked like this:
the gentleman handed me back the book and i sweetly thanked him, once again, and hauled ass to the kitchen. once i arrived back in the kitchen i couldn't stop laughing. like at all. the entire thing had given the kind of lolz that i couldn't control and just kept bubbling out. i managed to get the story out to the manager and truly it felt like i had just been reprimanded by my father. like the gentleman shorted me the five dollar discount that i had forgotten and then went above and beyond to dock my tip another three dollars. almost as if to punish me further and perhaps teach me a lesson about forgetfulness.
in all fairness - i had forgotten the discount and that's my bad.
but truly this gentleman was a prick.
shit happens. restaurants get busy and things get forgotten. but you bet your ass that i try and make up for it and go above and beyond to fix whatever mistake i made and be honest about it.
at the end of the day if that man feels way good about himself for shorting me on a tip because of a mistake i made that i offered to fix then so be it. i'll take my ten doll hairz (that i had to tip out on to other people so really i only made eight doll hairz on that table) and i'll enjoy the taco bell it bought me and i hope, you sir, enjoy your miserable life.
What a cunttard.
ReplyDeletehe was clearly having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.
Deleteslutcunt.
ReplyDeleteThe cat meme's LOL. I used to waitress at a banquet hall for weddings and holy hell... that was awful. I wouldn't do that again for all the money in the world. Who would have thought wedding guests could be such assholes and require so much attention. "Is this gluten free?!" More power to you for dealing with crappy customers!
ReplyDeleteHe's the kind of guy that uses a $5 off coupon on a $100 dinner. Enough said.
ReplyDeletewow. what a douchebag.
ReplyDeleteSeriously! What a dick...
ReplyDeleteYou should've spit in his food
ReplyDeleteoh man - every time someone says that i just think of the movie "waiting."
DeleteI one time had an old man ask me for an extra side of ranch dressing, and it completely slipped my mind. Then when I came back a few minutes later he asked again, and I said, "Oh, I'm so so sorry! I forgot, I"ll be right back." and then I promptly brought him his extra side of super important ranch. After he left, I came back to pick up the receipt, and on the tip line he wrote, "I FORGOT."
ReplyDeleteLike really.
PS what the hell did those people eat that was $100 for two people? MUST BE NICE TO BE RICH ASSHOLES.
SHUT UP RIGHT NOW HE DID?!
Deletei literally cannot even with that.
NO FOR REAL THAT REALLY HAPPENED. Waitressing was such a fulfilling time for me.
DeleteHaha but really some days I wish I could be waiting tables again because then at least when the assholes leave you're done with them and you don't have to come back and deal with them first thing the next day.
Can you tell how much I love my job? CAN YOU?
WHAT?! I would have politely asked if he was the guy from that "What Would You Do?" show.
ReplyDeleteJerklord.
What a prickly dick! I swear we best get extra shiny halos when we die because holy shit people are horrible to have to deal with! I work customer service, so I totally feel ya!
ReplyDeletewhat a dickface.
ReplyDeleteI never realized the amount of shit servers had to take until my bff worked at this trendy place in Chicago. Now, seeing this-holy crap. I tip well for great service, and still tip well for average service. You never know what kind of a day this server is having, or what else is going on. Honest mistake, and he does that. I had a day like that last week, where I was so mad, I just laughed. Because getting mad just doesn't do it justice. :)
ReplyDeleteWOW. I was a server for a few years (ok like 8) and there are some real assholes out there. One time I waited on a family of four - the two kids had to be no older than 10 and 12. I may have not given them the best service but I tried my hardest. Everything that could go wrong, went wrong. After they left I went to the table to pick up the book and I noticed the ENTIRE family wrote in crayon, all over the paper tablecloth what a terrible server I was. There wasn't an open white space left. Way to be a role model to your kids jacklegs.
ReplyDeleteSarah ~ http://sarahsayhello.blogspot.com
I was a server for 6 months. It was a very rough 6 months since I have a very hard time not being a smartass. Despite this, some people became my regulars since they grew to appreciate my asshole-ish attitude and they'd make fun of other customers with me.
ReplyDeleteI'm trying to decide whether this man is either exceedingly unhappy or entitled. Either way, I'm glad you were able to laugh... I probably would have been fuming.
ReplyDeleteYou should have just SMUTTED ALL OVER HIS SHIZZ. I don't understand how the moment people walk into restaurants they forget ALL KINDS OF GRACE. Because sure one person serves you, but REALLY there's a whole team of people who have the chance to EFF YOUR MEAL UP.
ReplyDeletethat is all.